All photos and content © Tanya Anguita.

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Mermaid

In the Sea of Life,
there are those that fight the waves,
And those
that the waters
recognize
as their own.

Mermaid --

Singer of magic,
Weaver of dreams,
Font of laughter,
Community builder,
Kindness bringer,
Bastion of strength,
And speaker of truths --

YOU ,
Loved by so many,
glide and dance
With remarkable power,
Over the rippling water's edge,
And straight into
The loving arms of Poseidon.

He's been waiting for you,
You know,
With love in his heart.

And now
The Waves
caress your Beloved face,
welcoming you Home
After seeming eons
of waiting
For your
Sweet Return.

©Tanya Anguita

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

She....

She is my heart
In a small warm body
Separate (and not)
From mine....

She is my best
Every thing...
My breath,
My soul,
My largest of the small.

She is a huge being
In a tiny package,
A mirror to
My harshest truths

She is the sun
Bright and powerful
To my waxing
And waning moon.

She is my dearest
My toughest,
My most beloved,
My teacher,
And my student.

She is my laughter,
My tears,
My hopes,
My fears,
She is Love,

She is Magic,

She is my Child.

And I am blessed to be her Mother.

©Tanya Anguita


Monday, September 8, 2014

Another Chance to get it Right

Full Moon has me up again
When I should be asleep;
All the doubtful, hateful thoughts
Into my psyche creep.
In Motherhood's clear mirror
Is a harsh and cruel reflection,
Filled with unkind, fearful thoughts
And glaring imperfection.
Black Dog wanders close to me
Pressed up against my leg.
Artemis's darker side
Takes me down a peg.
She used to make me brazen, warm;
To magnify my boldness.
I know Her fullness better now,
I'm Sister to Her coldness.
Instead of strength and fearlessness,
I'm wracked with doubt and worry.
Wound tighter than an 8 day clock,
I'm always in a hurry.
I feel like I am over-strung,
A bow that's pulled too tight.
The Lady Moon just magnifies
All that isn't right.
I've lost my way this moonlit night
So aimlessly I roam
I wander, fearful, in the dark
I can't find my way home.
I love Her still and gaze on Her
With Unrequited love,
While hoping that She'll send a
Fleeting smile from above.
Or grant me Grace where I have none --
A gesture made of kindness.
Her glacial glow a soothing balm -
A light to cure my Blindness.
I'd like to lay these frightful thoughts
Forever on a shelf;
To see in the Moon's Glory
The kindest version of my Self.
I want to see her Harvest-Strength -
She's Maiden, Mother, Crone -
To find in Her a brighter, truer
Image of my Own.
So here I am, Her supplicant,
Bathing in her light,
Naked in my honesty,
A wingless bird in flight.
Writing out this crazy prayer
Under a cloudless sky
While learning how to glide and dip -
If not exactly fly.
As long as I don't hit the ground
In blazing, flaming glory,
I have the chance to daily write
A new part of my story.
So maybe that's the lesson
On this Moonful, thoughtful night -
That every minute is
Another Chance to get it Right.
Thank you Lovely Luna
For the lessons that you teach,
Even on the harsher nights
When you feel out of reach.
I think that I'll repeat myself
Because it soothes my soul:
Every minute is another chance
To make One whole.
I think that that's my lesson
On this Moonful, Thoughtful Night -
That Every minute is
Another Chance to get it Right.

(c) Tanya Anguita
9/8/2014


Friday, June 20, 2014

Black Dog

Black Dog
is
gnawing at my soul tonight.
Can't get out
from under the weight
of its heavy jaw
which is wrapped
around the tender confines
of my weary heart.

I am out of resources,
out of joy,
and at a loss
for where to find them.

The Ol' Red Shoes
are dancing me
relentlessly around the room
these days
to a never-ending loop
of the Song of Despair
while my heart
bleeds out
through my raw soul
on a glass-strewn dance floor
in a hostile bar
called "Life."

I'm drowning on land,
choking on dirt and earthly matter(s)
Swallowing my filthy pride
in gulps of rubble and grime.

Oh how I'd like to sink into the mire,
settle into the loam below,
and stop fighting
the "good" fight.

Every gesture
(in the attempt to keep afloat)
feels like
Futility,
cloaked in
"Why?"
in a never-ending trek
towards
Failure.

I have nothing left
to offer
and I'm too tired
to care.

I used to think that
Joy
was my due.

I thought that
Happiness
was something
I would always find.

I believed that
Love
was boundless;
that
Delight
was not fleeting.

But
Exhaustion
is replete,
Anger
eats away at me,
Impatience and Resentment
are poisoning my thoughts,
and my actions.

My account at the
Give a Fuck Bank
is almost empty...
save for the few pennies
rattling around
in the rusty bottom
of the worn tin can
of loving care
that
I'm rabidly guarding
to share with
the beautiful child
it is my job
and my blessing
to raise.

It feels like not enough tonight
and I'm scared.

(c) Tanya Anguita
June 20, 2014

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Smoke-scented Midnight

Smoke-scented midnight
steals my sleep.
I long for Nothing
but the stillness
that will not come tonight.

Full Moon Glorious --
Pumpkin orange as it rose --
I taste Magic
in the night sky.

Distant memories
of ancient selves...
vie for precedence
in the now.

Which "me" is Me?

A shimmer in the
Spirit Veil...
A shiver on the breeze.

I’ve forgotten how to write;
How to “use my words”
And in so many ways
It just doesn’t matter.
And in so many ways
It Does.

Which "me" is Me?

Sleep-deprived,
I’m sometimes lonely
for my other Selves;
For those pieces of me
lying dormant;
For the comfy jeans feel of
the Personal Identifiers
I’m accustomed to
But cannot find.

An owl in the darkness
Asks me “Who?”
In moon-twisted reverie,
My silence is his answer.

Smoke-scented midnight
steals my sleep.
I long for Nothing
but the stillness
that will not come tonight.

Full Moon Glorious --
I taste Magic
in the night sky...

(c) Tanya Anguita
10/19/2013

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Swallows Me Whole

The moon wakes my soul
She swallows me whole
And now
She
Will not let me sleep!
The sphere in the sky
With a clear seeing eye
Laughs
When I try to count sheep.
She knows my heart
She tears it apart
Then She
Puts it together again.
This early morn
I'm being reborn
In the ebb
Of her bright wax
And wane.

-- Tanya Anguita

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Unknown Futures

Blue moon
pregnant with portent,
mysterious in the late summer sky,
giving birth to unknown futures
and untold changes,

You are my hope and my promise tonight.

Thank you
for offering illumation
through the darkness
of my uncertain thoughts
and
light
on the path
to brighter tomorrows.


Beloved Blue Moon,
I know we won't see you for a while
So
I'd like to sign that 3 year contract with you now.

You know...
The one that offers
grace and gratitude,
solace and strength,
joy and fortitude.

The one that allows one
to embrace
Belief
in
one's self.

The one with 
the ability and agility
to do
whatever needs to be done.

When you appear again
we can re-negotiate our agreement,
but I suspect
that I will simply take
my soul in hand
and sign on the dotted line
while giving gracious thanks
for your
glorious return.

Blue moon
pregnant with portent,
mysterious in the late summer sky,
giving birth to unknown futures
and untold changes,

You are my hope and my promise tonight.

© Tanya Anguita