Thankful. Thank FULL! Full of Thanks. Hmmm...
The mind is a baffling place sometimes. It sends me dreams and strange portents. It offers solace from itself. It eats itself and then creates itself anew. I find laughter in the darkest corners of it and sadness sometimes in amongst the light. I gain sleep and anxiety in the same night. I am able to still some thoughts while being run over by others. Did I mention that the mind is a baffling place sometimes?
The gratitudes I sing today include:
1) Getting two nights of decent sleep for the first time in over a month. 8 hours a night for two nights. Miraculous and wonderful. May this trend continue. :)
2) Making the choice to take care of myself rather than push myself this winter. I'm sad not to be a part of something new and shiny and exciting, but SO proud of myself for taking care of ME. This is HUGE step for me as many of you know. Saying "no" to something I would very much like to do, is NOT my strong suit! (understatement...*blush*) But I did it! I did it! And I'm proud of me (even with the wistfulness)! Hooray for personal growth!
3) My mom is coming down for the weekend starting tomorrow and I'm SO excited to get a few days with her. She's my hot date to go see Elizabeth Gilbert speak tomorrow night. Woohoo! Can not WAIT!
4) Tonight, I finally get to go to hear Cafe Americain (http://www.cafeamericainsf.com/home.html) and the magical session they run at Cafe Trieste in North Beach. I've been hearing about this wonderful evening for a long time but Wednesday rehearsals have always taken precedence. I"m thrilled to finally get to go. (EDIT) OH! It was SO much fun! Silliness plus great musicianship, plus fabulous company, plus yummy plum tart equals WIN!!!! Thank you Carma, Julie, Michael, Ned & Jason for a wonderful evening!!!!
5) I just found out today that the guy I thought was going to be my manager is now NOT going to be. I could do a happy dance right here at my desk, but my co-workers would look at me very strangely if I did. *grin* Hooray! NO Micro-managing Napoleon as my supervisor! YAY!
6) Random humourous chat exchanges that make me literally laugh aloud rock! :)
7) Knowing that I've put clean sheets on the bed and that I get to crawl into them tonight. YAY!
8) Having an awesome doctor who draws diagrams and pulls out books to explain things.
9) Learning to be mostly okay with my house being a little messy with my mom coming to visit. It isn't crazy messy...and I'm starting to get that she's not going to judge me for it. Growth. We love it!
10) Knowing that I only have one more workday this week. Hooray!
11) Going to bed at a reasonable hour again tonight and believing that I'll actually sleep again! YAY!