All photos and content © Tanya Anguita.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Open Heart

can't breathe,
too full.
ache's here,
passion's fool.
i want..
i wish..
he was bird,
i was fish.
i was happy,
he was gruff.
there was friendship,
i want  love.
fear haunts.
fires burn.
i live.
i learn.
"next time,"
i think,
"i'll get it right,
this love won't sink."
busy bodied,
hurried mind,
the next one left
me behind.
don't stop,
please stay.
this one ran.
that one's away.
this one teases.
that one hides.
i please.
i provide.
simple shelter,
open heart,
open booked
from the start.
these fevered thoughts!
sorrow's laughter...
i want the "yes,
forever after."
i have seen it,
it exists.
i bore witness
to wedded bliss.
so much beauty,
so many graces;
watching love
on both their faces.
their union is
authentic; real!
and that's the way
i want to feel.

and so
i wonder,
alone tonight,
will i ever
get love right?

i hope.
i yearn.
i'm so damned ready,
when's my turn?

© Tanya Anguita


  1. the longing is so palpable. thank you for opening your heart like this. I know it's not the same, but I send my love anyway.

  2. Terena,

    Your love helps a lot. And thank you for your words. I am thankful for you!
    :) T

  3. This made me verklempt. I have often and in general do feel the same. I have seen it. It can exist. I'm not willing to half-ass it or settle or get into something unhealthy again though, I'd rather be alone. Sigh. Maybe I'll get out there again someday. I try not to admit to myself that I feel just like your last verse. I just want to try to be happy anyway, but the truth is, that's exactly how I feel. Thanks for speaking my heart. I knew you were a great photographer and hoofer, but _man_ can you write.


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