Here I am again. Prepared to prattle. Prepped to parse. Peppy and perky. Well, maybe not actually peppy and perky, but particularly pleased with the pepper in my paprikash and proud to partake of your pecan pieeeee. (And apparently terrifically fond of words that start with "P". *grin*)
I love alliteration. It trips happily off of my tongue and it makes me giggle. Tee-freaking-hee. I'm a little slap-happy today, can you tell?
Returned Sunday night from 4 magnificent days in Colorado with dear friends and am having a hard time with re-entry today. Feeling a bit overwhelmed and remembering why I like leaving town so much and why I have such a hard time returning to my work and to my life and that is leaving me with rather dismal feelings. I feel so unsettled everywhere in my life and I am really, really not enjoying this sensation.
The good news is that I do actually recognize that I have infinite possibility laid out before me and that I just have to figure out what route to take to move forward.
The bad news comes in the form of a joke two of my best friends made and modified about me some years ago. One said "How do you starve a Libra? Send her to an open refrigerator and tell her she can have anything that she wants." The other shortened it to "Hand her a menu." *wry grin* It wouldn't be so funny and so painful if it weren't true. Too many options with no direction leaves me feeling like a deer in the headlights. I end up feeling stuck. Trust me, I am very aware that the journey of a thousand miles started with one small step, but I'm never sure which way I should be facing, whether I've got the right shoes on, or where it is I'm trying to go.
Which, thankfully, brings me right back around to thankfulness that I do have choices and that fact makes me incredibly blessed. :) Ahhh...circular thinking...how I love thee. Not. ;)
At any rate, I was recently reminded by examples beautifully set by Dominic, Rico and Laura, to write my gratitudes and so here I am. And y'know? They help before I even get to the part where I express my gratefulness. Heh. (At least I amuse myself, eh?)
January was a bumpy month. Illness, family illness, and general exhaustion from both. February, well...it seemed to follow suit...and quite frankly, I'm tired. I need to remember what I'm thankful for. I think I've lost sight of that again. Oy...re-upping the positivity quotient now...getting back into the habit. (Why is it so easy to fall into the habit of negative thought and so tough sometimes to stick with positive thought? Hmmmm....)
The other night Michael, Katie, Will and I decided that there should be a secret month added between February and March...we call it Extra-ruary. It has 45 days and can only be used for catching up on looming projects, sleep deficits, the up until the first of Extra-ruary to-do list, and all of those "I wish there were 28 hours in the day" sorts of things. Think it will catch on? I do. ;)
Without further prattling, today I sing my gratitudes for:
1) Spending a magnificent 4 days with Michelle & Tim and their wonderful daughters Annaliese and Chiara. So much ease, good laughter, giggling girls, fantastic camera geeking, playing "Flower" with Tim and turning 5 again, superb conversations, and just an all around wonderful time. I remembered what relaxing felt like. It felt good. Thank you all so much for being so wonderful as to have me in your lives for a few days. I love you all so very much!
2) Dominic, Rico and Laura for the reminder to do this.
3) Fantastic conversations with my beloved sister-in-law-and-spirit Heather. Thank you for being who you are and for everything that you're doing and for your beautiful ability to express yourself so clearly. I love you so!
4) Deep breathing. Today I am thankful for deep breathing. I think it may be the only thing that gets me through the day. Well...that and remembering gratitude. *wry smile*
5) Finding that I forgot to post this and getting to finish it now. :)
6) Ups and downs. They remind me that life is cyclical and that when I'm in a downswing, that I'm not there forever.
7) The faith that my friends have in me. I'm so blown away by and so thankful for this.
8) Time with Monique and Eileen. What a blessed evening!
9) Long walks and talks with Amy.
10) Getting an evening with Stephanie and Daphne! So easy and so good. Can't believe it had been so many years since I'd seen Daphne, because it was so easy to be with her!
12) The Isabelle Borchgrave and Arthur Szyk Exhibits at the Legion of Honor. What a revelation that whole day was! A lovely brunch and dinner with Deirdre, bumping into Karen & John, and the added bonus of amazing art and time with wonderful women. Such a gift!
I love these women! :)
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